Finding a partner is not easy and still difficult is overcoming the grief when you lose the same partner. Read on to find how you can cope with a break-up..

Sunita got dumped by her boyfriend of five years and did not know what to do. Her life came to a standstill. She could not see beyond the horizon. She lost interest in work and no amount of consoling from friends made any difference. She suffered for months and finally one day she overcame her sadness and realised that life is much more than grieving over the past. She began her journey to find herself and

The end of a relationship

You fall in love, the relationship blossoms and you are on top of the world. You cannot even imagine the person not being there for even a day in your life. But slowly things go downhill and one day lightening strikes. Your partner wants to end the relationship or circumstances make it impossible to be together. Staying apart seems the only solution. The love that blossomed in the spring of affection wilts in a moment. The break-up is done and you find yourself groping in the dark.

Take time to get into a new relationship

You are blown apart and shattered into pieces. It takes time for the verdict to sink in. You feel like you are swimming against the current and yet try to keep afloat. The first thing you want to do when you are single again is, fill up the void. Avoid doing this. Do not get into a love affair because you are lonely now. Give yourself some time to heal. Be friends, meet people but give new relationships some time. It is not compulsory to be in a relationship all the time. So avoid dating immediately.

Avoid alcohol and drug abuse

A break-up can give you a terrible time. You may not feel like facing the world. You may be questioning the purpose of your life. Your self-esteem may be at an all time low. Every step may seem like pulling a hoe. However hard it may seem do not give into alcohol and drug abuse. They will never change your situation. Do not try to gain sympathy by immersing yourself into self afflicting habits. They only double the damage.

Discover yourself

You may feel that the whole world has come to an end when your relationship ends. But remember, we are all knit closely into a chain of events. The end of your relationship may be a new beginning. It is the right time to come out of the rut and discover yourself. Question yourself and try understanding yourself. Do what makes you happy, go for walks, write, read or join a yoga class. There may be some special qualities in you and now is the time to let them show. Sometimes solitude is good break from the chaotic lives we live.

When to consult a Psychiatrist

Sometimes no amount of advice, cajoling or consoling seems useful. You may be feeling blue all the time. Chances of going under depression are higher. Even getting a whiff of the same perfume your partner wore may take you back to painful memories. You may feel surging emotions of ending your life since life has no purpose or meaning. The time you get such feelings, it is advisable to visit a professional counselor or a psychiatrist. Life is too precious to be wasted on somebody who does not care about you. A professional can help you change your perspective and help you cope with the change.

Tips on making yourself feel better

A break-up may be tough to overcome and no one else can feel what you feel. It is difficult to mend a broken heart but not impossible. As the famous saying goes ‘time heals everything.’ Here are a few tips that can help you speed up the healing process and turn yourself towards a life and partner you truly deserve.

• Give yourself time
  
  
• Be brave
  
  
• Go for a massage
  
  
• Listen to music
  
  
• Try aromatherapy
  
  
• Cry as much as you want
  
  
• Get rid of the things that remind you of your relationships
  
  
• Avoid texting, calling and e-mailing your ex
  
  
• Avoid places your partner frequents
  
  
• Try to move on
  
  
• Take up a new hobby
  
  
• Try what you have never tried before
  
  
• Get a makeover done. Even a haircut can make you feel better
  
  
• Avoid fighting, screaming and nasty behaviour. It gives nothing
  
  
• Avoid being revengeful
  
  
• Try to respect your partner’s decision
  
  
• Read inspiring quotes
  
  
• Get closer to nature
  
  
• Meet new people
  
  
• Avoid being alone